arantius.com

Codename: Sugarbomb

2004-08-14 17:56 - General

One morning, I was sitting down to breakfast, and ended up with a bowl of Lucky Charms cereal. I suddenly recalled this classic scene from The Simpsons:

Bart: Aw, damn FDA! Why can't it all be marshmallows?
Lisa: Ew! Bart, don't put the non-marshmallow pieces back in the box. They go in the trash!

I, of course, then had visions of pure-marshmallow Lucky Charms. Almost enough to give you diabetes right there. Long story short, I got serious, and offered a pure-marshmallow box of Lucky Charms in trade for an invite to gmail. Lo and behold, someone took the bait! I got my account, and they were ready to just say, "Thanks for the laugh!" Well, that wasn't it for me. I already had fun ideas of how to craft such a box, and I wanted to get it done. Well, I got her address and this weekend I got to making a very special box of cereal.

The first step was research. The pure sugar shock of eating Lucky Charms had lead me to believe it might be a 50/50 ratio of cereal to marshmallow. A closer inspection of the remains of my inspiration box quickly showed me the marshmallow content was closer to 1/3rd. Visions danced quickly in my head, and I started to wonder just what I needed to buy in order to make this happen. I started to think I might need to spend quite a lot to get enough boxes, but luck was with me once I got to the store.

Anyways, the sorting of my inspiration box into separate bowls verified my initial survey, I'd probably need 3 boxes to get marshmallows for 1. With the knowledge that my inspiration box was the 20oz size, and that there was a smaller one, I figured I might be able to get off with less by getting a smaller box. Yes, indeed there was a 14oz box sitting on the shelf. And eureka, a tiny little 8.75oz box! It felt a bit like cheating, but I got one of each and some simple figures in my head let me believe that I was home free.

My inspiration box was sorted out, and I had planned to let that be emergency reserves in case I was left short handed towards the end. It ended up being the other way around, but that's just the way the cookie crumbles. So, I wanted to make sure I ended up with a box that would be a fun surprise. My goal was to have the box, when I was done, be indistinguishable from a regular box. Until it is opened and the sugar mine is revealed and plundered!

I decided to open the box from the bottom, so any traces I might leave behind would be that much less noticable. Moreover, the original glue would be in place for the top of the box and the inner bag, sealing the illusion. I practiced first on my medium box, prying open carefully with a knife. Results were superb. Then, opening the bag again from the bottom very carefully, to allow re-sealing.

Now the tedious sorting truly begins. Counting the research sorting, I spend an hour and forty five minutes picking up cereal pieces and marshmallows. Slow going, and tedious, but an artist suffers for his work. As I said before, my research box was going to be reserves, and then it ended up being the base. Hey, I only had 3 bowls there with me. On top of the research box, I had the whole medium box sorted out, the marshmallows from both about filled up the bowl I was holding them in. So, after emptying the small box, I filled it with the marshmallows I had sorted out. It was almost full! I sorted about half of the small boxes' original content, and decided to try again. Voila, the small box was now full of marshmallows!

Only three things remained. A whole bunch of toasted oat cereal, half a box of Lucky Charms, and the piece de resistance, my box of all marshmallows! Now comes the final step, sealing up the box so that it looks original. This is where the Elmers comes in.

First I sealed up the bag. With a makeshift brush of folded paper, I spread a thin layer of glue over the entire area that used to be holding the bag closed. With the glue in place, a bag clip held it all together, and I took a break to let the glue do it's thing.

Once the bag was near enough to sealed (the glue will have plenty of time to dry later), I set to reclosing the box. This came in two steps. First, the side flaps were glued to the inside main flap, and held with paper clips. Another break for the glue to set, and the outside flap was glued to the inside, faithfully recreating the original manufacture process. We are done! Relax with the knowledge that the world now has another box full of sugar.